A Prayer, A Poem, A Word

I found this and it spoke to me about where we are...trying to embrace God's vision and to allow for older visions that don't resonate to be celebrated and let go.

A long time I have lived with you

And now we must be going

Separately to be together.  

Perhaps I shall be the wind

To blur your smooth waters

So that you do not see your face too much.  

Perhaps I shall be the star

To guide your uncertain wings

So that you have direction in the night.  

Perhaps I shall be the fire

To separate your thoughts

so that you do not give up.  

Perhaps I shall be the rain

To open up the earth

So that your seed may fall.  

Perhaps I shall be the snow

To let your blossoms sleep

So that you may bloom in spring.  

Perhaps I shall be the stream

To play a song on the rock

So that you are not alone.  

Perhaps I shall be a new mountain

So that you always have a home.  

-Nancy Wood, Earth Prayer From Around the World, edited by Elizabeth Roberts and Elias Amidon, 1991.

Of the many things that must change in me so that I may follow Christ, I will celebrate the life of those things that can no longer be for me but that have made me who I am.  It is not easy to leave some things behind but it is even harder for me to refuse to change though I know abundance and love are calling forward.

Rebecca

Do We Wait Upon Worry?

Waking up to a thunder storm on Monday does not always inspire a productive day...it is hard to get up when you know from the start you will be dealing with rain and cold even before you have to get out of the warm and comfortable bed.  Not to mention that gray skies don't give me the same skip in my step as the blue and sunny skies of other days.  Rainy days feel like good days for reflection, which may be why I find myself pondering the dynamic of waiting and worrying today.

Sometimes I actively wait upon something, it gives me energy and vision to think of possibilities and ideas.  But there is also a fine line where that activity moves over into an area of worrying about how things will work out or not.  And once I get to that point it can take time for me to see that I have shifted.  Then it takes even more time to work myself out of the distraction of worrying about what might happen.  For me this worry is like the overcast skies and rain clouds of a thunderstorm.  I know before I begin the day that everything will be colored by this reality and it's hard not to give into the invitation to be lazy and just let the day slip by without digging into anything.  Don't get me wrong some days that is exactly the right thing to do.  Other days there is a second invitation to actively seek out ways to engage in the life before us while giving ourselves permission to not worry about what might happen and instead to live for today. 

For me though, it is so easy to get pulled into the worry that it can take my mind far from the things that i might do to build toward the possibilities I am waiting for.  I can be so distracted by my anxiety that I don't see the small steps before me that move me in the direction I want to go.  I think of the saying that "you can't see the forest for the trees."  If our focus is so intense on anything, even really good ideas, hopes, dreams we may find ourselves motionless or at the very least sluggish about living life fully.  


In Matthew 25:31-34, Jesus says,

“So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today." (NLT)

Funny that some lessons I remember "learning" have a way of cropping up again...so I am reminded today that rainy days come and they go.  No matter the weather I have choice to make about how I live.  I can take a deep breath and begin to step out, hoping soon to find shelter or sunshine, or I can stand still in the rain.  Seems like a no brainer as I watch the water pour down the windows, however, sometimes I find that I have been standing still in the proverbial rain and have almost forgotten how long I have been there.

I wonder how much life I miss when my eyes focus only on the things I wait upon...lots of things in life are worth waiting for but not worrying over.  So if you find yourself living in more rainy days than not maybe there is an invitation to move towards a sunny spot or a shelter that will give you a new perspective on your journey or at the very least keep you from getting drenched by worry. 


It is one thing to get caught in the rain and another to hold yourself captive there.  I hope we can all find the beauty of our journeys through our days, rain or shine.  May we all look to the future with hope and may worry not distract us from the joy of the moment for the sake of what is to come. 

An Identity Opportunity

I have been thinking a lot about identity lately. It’s  stressful to really look deeply into who we are (or aren't) because we may find that some things need to change in order for us to become the people God wants us to be.

I have heard over the years that the Chinese symbol for "crisis" is also the symbol for "opportunity."  So this "crisis" that I have been experiencing of trying to understand the ways that God is calling me and our community to expand our definitions of who we are is an opportunity to claim those things about ourselves that help us and to leave behind some of those things that hold us back.  So easy to say...

When children start the process of going from childhood to adulthood the stages are often labeled as "growing pains"  because it is hard to do but there is no other choice.  Some things just have to grow and change even if we aren't ready or don't really want them to change.  Have you ever thought that a teenage boy wants his voice to crack when he's speaking in front of his class or that a teenager girl wants to go through the "awkward" stages as her body changes?  I don't remember it being like that...I remember having no choice but trying to make the best of it at the time.  

I wonder though if part of the problem now is that I expected to be done with dealing with the changes after puberty was over, like growing up had an endpoint.  Do we set ourselves up for even more discomfort with the changes that are inherent in living by telling ourselves that only a few times in life will the changes be out of our control?  The thing I am learning is that often things are out of my control but there are lots of opportunities for me to understand or gracefully address the changes in my life and in the development of our community of faith.  (There is also the option of giving into the chaos and losing almost all perspective, I confess I sometimes find myself there :) )  So how do we as a community engage in the opportunity of renewal and recreation by gracefully attending to the changes of our life together and finding ways to continue living through the sometimes difficult "growing pains" of discovering a new identity?  

  

I don’t have the answer, but I believe that together we may discover the answers by embracing the changes while seeking answers to the questions that challenge us and our world.

Lingering Questions...

I recently heard a speaker who posed a question and it captured my imagination as we, at Zacchaeus' Tree, develop as a community of faith I wondered how it might invite us into a different way of being "the Church."

He asked this, "Is the Church a place where difficult questions are asked and allowed to linger?" 

In my experience talking with people in all different walks of life, I have not gotten the impression that most people expect "the Church" to be a place where we ask questions or much less where it is safe to ask them.  I wonder if over time the communities of faith that developed fell into patterns of community that gave stability but turned into a rigid adherence to rules, rather than a commitment to continued discovery.  Isn't that how most of us work?  We start something and as we get settled into the routine we do less of the things that created the routine and made it exciting in the beginning.  Then it becomes the norm and changing it means that we have to be uncomfortable again and experiment with new things.  During time of high creativity we expect lots of changes and energy around what is new.  When we begin to get comfortable and edge into maintaining things it is easy to forget to keep trying new things and looking for new opportunities for growth.   We can also do so many new things that we never get settled into living giving routines and customs that invite us to go further in our faith and the development of community. 

Part of developing new communities and routines is in order to create a better system to maintain but if we do not consistently evaluate the things that we are maintaining we will miss opportunities for further growth and discovery.  It isn't easy to be a place where we ask difficult questions.  All people aren't ready to deal with the same difficult questions at the same time.  How can we endeavor to honor these questions, accept the discomfort and support one another as we navigate the questions with integrity, hope and love?  I want to be a part of a community where the questions that lay upon our minds can be asked safely and with the support of those around us.  What would that look like for you?  Would you participate?  And how would we know that we were that kind of place for the new people we meet? 

The second part of the question refers to letting things linger.  If you are at all like me, you prefer to have an answer--yes or no.  I tend to run quickly to an answer, even if it is painful simply so I don't have to live with uncertainty.  As much as I value uncertainty and its invitation to grow...I don't like it and it is a discipline for me to practice letting things linger.  In community it can be even harder to let things linger because we each are trying to manage our own anxiety and to gauge the anxiety of others.  We can reach out for any certainty, even a wrong one simply so we don't have to live with the unknown anymore.  How can we practice the discipline of letting things hang around for a while, unanswered and see what possibilities develop?  What does it look like for a group of individuals to figure out ways to linger together around particular questions and care for one another while we wait?   How can we as a small community cultivate a culture of question asking and a comfort with allowing our questions to linger--unanswered but not forgotten?

There are lots of questions...let's become a place and a community to ask them!

Introducing new blogger

My name is Melissa Landau and I am starting a new blog for Z Tree church in Indianapolis. I hope to include news about discussions from Bible study, Congregational Reflection time during worship services, and book studies so that others can share in the conversation. Inviting thoughts, comments, and observations about participation in opportunities to minister around town would be included as well. There are no doubt plenty of things to talk about that I have not even thought of yet! Maybe other folks will have some good ideas, too.

I enjoy attending Z Tree because it offers an accepting environment for spiritual exploration within the context of the Christian tradition. I can ask questions and receive responses that reflect depth of thought and knowledge. The questions that come up from others are thought-provoking and often challenge me to look at issues from a different perspective and think them through more thoroughly than I have in the past. My ideas and comments are met with respect. More importantly, I am met with respect.

I am proud to come from a church background that has a history of people holding fast to their faith and staying together even when enduring persecution during the Protestant Reformation. They suffered because they dared to challenge the status quo and bring forth new ideas and ways of worshiping and serving. But they never lost sight of the message of Jesus and they eventually journeyed to places all over the globe to bring the Gospel to new areas. We at Z Tree share in the challenge of this tradition as we seek to come together in community and find ways to minister to those who could use some Good News.

I am looking forward to bringing ideas and information to others and looking forward to hearing what people have to say.

Love is not Tame

"Love is an untamed force.  When we try to control it, it destroys us.  When we try to imprison it, it enslaves us.  When we try to understand, it leaves us feeling lost and confused."  Paulo Coelho

When I read, The Chronicles of Narnia by C. S. Lewis for the first time I was drawn into the description of Aslan.  Aslan is the Creator, Redeemer and Sustainer of Narnia and is also a lion.  The thing about Aslan is that he is always close to the people and talking beasts of Narnia but he cannot be held or captured.  Throughout the story we are reminded that he is not a tame lion.  As I read this quote, it reminded me of the way that characters in the book long to hear from and talk to Aslan but there is no way to control him.  He comes...always at the right time but not a moment before.  Or maybe he is there all along but just doesn't appear until the moment of decision.  


As the "Church" has developed over time and into institutional structures, many of which are valuable and helpful to the edifying of the Body of Christ in the world, we have sometimes sought to control God or at the very least humanity's understanding of God.  Keeping God safely within our expectations and comfort levels.  It is hard for me when I don't understand things.  Part of me would love to get "it" and never have to deal with the ambiguity of living my life without all the answers.  But the truth is that the more I live into the Good News of God's love for the whole world I get further from the black and white and go deeper into a fullness of grace and peace than I ever imagined.  Accepting that I won't understand it all, makes it easier for me to live into Jesus' challenge to "Love the Lord with all you heart, soul and mind" and to "Love your neighbor as yourself."  

God is Love!  Here I begin...

There is rarely an explanation that really shows how and why love happens here or there.  There is nothing that explains how love can be so difficult and even sometimes lead to our own suffering and yet we continue to search for it.  Love in all its manifestations is  powerful and motivating while also being very unpredictable.  It seems that love picks us not the other way around.    

Love is a word and an idea that many of us use to talk about our passions, to push us to do better and sometimes it is also the excuse for why we do not do enough.  When we love the lines get blurred and our ability to be objective goes with it, at least that is true of me.  But I don't think that is all bad...when we are subjective, we are less likely to make judgements based on assumptions, stereotypes, or extremist opinions.  What if we were able to make our decisions always based on personal experience?  What if we "always" knew someone who was affected?  How would that change our rhetoric about family, human sexuality, politics, immigration, workers' rights, gun control, abortion...and the list goes on?  How might we begin to see the world through the eyes of love?  What would it be like if every agenda became the life or reality of our child?  How might our reactions be different? 

I imagine that we would all see ways that we had over simplified our arguments due to lack of knowledge or experience.  I imagine we would be more compassionate with others and ourselves as we began to delve into the complexities of an issue that connects to our lives.  I imagine that we would listen more than talk.  I imagine that we would be less efficient but more effective in our relationships and world.  I imagine that we would find great abundance and joy in the living of life.  

Love is tangled web...and with faith and hope I pray we will weave together a story of reconciliation and redemption for all!  I believe that love like Aslan, always shows up just in time!  As God leads us by loving us despite our faults and failures we can do the same for one another.  I imagine that love will continue to transform the world as we learn to let it control our lives rather than our lives trying to control love.  

What’s In A Story: A Study of Jesus’ Parables at Z Tree!

Jesus often used short stories, called parables, to teach people about God. He used ordinary symbols, ideas and things that most people are familiar with to open eyes to the larger realities of God’s love and Kin(g)dom in the world. In the next 8 weeks, beginning Saturday April 9, 2011 at 4pm we will be studying 8 of these parables.

We will focus each week on a particular parable. You are invited to read the parable each day and consider three questions. As a group we will reflect on those same questions and explore the meaning, context, and application of the parable on our lives.

Are you read the parable consider these questions

What is the story about? (characters, theme, plot)

How does the story affect you? (provoke, challenge, confuse, entertain, etc)

What do you think it means?

Readings

Week 1: Mustard-seed & Leaven. Matthew 13:31-33

Week 2: Ten virgins. Matthew 25:1-13.

Week 3: Wise and foolish builders. Matthew 7:24-27.

Week 4: Laborers hired. Matthew 20:1-16.

Week 5: Tree and its fruit. Luke 6:43-45.

Week 6: Prodigal son. Luke 15:11-32.

Week 7: Vine and branches. John 15:1-5.

Week 8: Good Samaritan. Luke 10:30-37.

Join us in reading and exploring these stories through you own personal devotional time and on Saturdays at 4pm!